Comments on: 21 Qualities Of A Good Marriage http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/ Those with insight should have the foresight to act or react with wisdom Tue, 23 Mar 2010 01:12:26 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.9.2 hourly 1 By: Ras Liberty http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-101 Ras Liberty Fri, 10 Jul 2009 15:12:10 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-101 It is also not bad at all to share sexual fantasies together and if possible act them out. It must however be noted that emotional implications could accompany this act and both partners should be fully aware of what they are getting into so as to be able to deal with any guilt that would arise after the act. It is also not bad at all to share sexual fantasies together and if possible act them out. It must however be noted that emotional implications could accompany this act and both partners should be fully aware of what they are getting into so as to be able to deal with any guilt that would arise after the act.

]]> By: Ras Liberty http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-100 Ras Liberty Fri, 10 Jul 2009 15:07:33 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-100 Marriage requires a chunk of intelligence to make it succeed. It also depends on the expectations of the spouses when entering the marriage. My advice to spouses is not to expect too much and be committed to making their marriage work rather than comparing it to others. Marriage requires a chunk of intelligence to make it succeed. It also depends on the expectations of the spouses when entering the marriage. My advice to spouses is not to expect too much and be committed to making their marriage work rather than comparing it to others.

]]> By: O.A. Wisen http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-52 O.A. Wisen Thu, 19 Feb 2009 19:34:09 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-52 Yes, times have changed, but some also say that the more things change, the more they say the same. Thrown out the door by whom – by you or by some others? Are you willing to let others dictate that on your behalf? Only you can know the answer. I believe marriage can be the way described, primarily because there are tons (though a minority) of others that think so too and actually live it. Like everything else in life, it's what you choose to make of it, and the efforts you are willing to put in that achieve spectacular results. People expect their marriages to be great by default, but it’s more successful as a joint effort, and by fierce determination to obtain what you want without settling for mediocre. A little more effort gets one to places they may have never reached if they didn't push themselves. That's the nature of unrelenting effort. Obviously, no marriage is perfect, but a lot more than what people think is attainable actually is. Yes, times have changed, but some also say that the more things change, the more they say the same. Thrown out the door by whom – by you or by some others? Are you willing to let others dictate that on your behalf? Only you can know the answer.
I believe marriage can be the way described, primarily because there are tons (though a minority) of others that think so too and actually live it.
Like everything else in life, it’s what you choose to make of it, and the efforts you are willing to put in that achieve spectacular results. People expect their marriages to be great by default, but it’s more successful as a joint effort, and by fierce determination to obtain what you want without settling for mediocre.
A little more effort gets one to places they may have never reached if they didn’t push themselves. That’s the nature of unrelenting effort. Obviously, no marriage is perfect, but a lot more than what people think is attainable actually is.

]]> By: Jae http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-49 Jae Wed, 18 Feb 2009 20:37:01 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-49 These are all ideal..but can it be ever that way? Times have definitely changed and some of these are thrown out the dooor. These are all ideal..but can it be ever that way? Times have definitely changed and some of these are thrown out the dooor.

]]> By: O.A. Wisen http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-23 O.A. Wisen Mon, 25 Aug 2008 20:32:13 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-23 Thanks Kaila and “The Gem”. These are great comments. I have observed over time that sometimes when asking people for advice, they are quick to provide advice that doesn't lean in favor of forgiveness and understanding. It makes sense because they are not emotionally connected to the situation the way that you are and cannot accurately weigh it from your perspective. If a spouse listens to such people without properly weighing all the variables, the end result may be a damaged marriage. These so-called advisers end up going back to their respective homes and stay married to their spouses, even though they also deal with similar or other issues in their own marriage (which may be worse). If a spouse has to discuss with anyone, it is best to go to someone that is trusted implicitly and has a track record of promoting positive and amicable resolutions. Better yet, they should help put the situation in perspective without actually stating absolutes. If we ever find ourselves in the position of an adviser, it is wise to know that we should always let people come to their own conclusion themselves. Hopefully as a “trusted adviser” the intent is not to be a home wrecker. Most people don't go out to seek help to arrive at destructive conclusions (they can accomplish that task themselves). Rather people usually ask others for help when they want constructive answers and actually want a positive outcome. Constructive advice does not destroy, it builds/mends. Thanks Kaila and “The Gem”. These are great comments. I have observed over time that sometimes when asking people for advice, they are quick to provide advice that doesn’t lean in favor of forgiveness and understanding. It makes sense because they are not emotionally connected to the situation the way that you are and cannot accurately weigh it from your perspective.

If a spouse listens to such people without properly weighing all the variables, the end result may be a damaged marriage. These so-called advisers end up going back to their respective homes and stay married to their spouses, even though they also deal with similar or other issues in their own marriage (which may be worse).

If a spouse has to discuss with anyone, it is best to go to someone that is trusted implicitly and has a track record of promoting positive and amicable resolutions. Better yet, they should help put the situation in perspective without actually stating absolutes.

If we ever find ourselves in the position of an adviser, it is wise to know that we should always let people come to their own conclusion themselves. Hopefully as a “trusted adviser” the intent is not to be a home wrecker. Most people don’t go out to seek help to arrive at destructive conclusions (they can accomplish that task themselves). Rather people usually ask others for help when they want constructive answers and actually want a positive outcome. Constructive advice does not destroy, it builds/mends.

]]> By: The Gem http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-21 The Gem Thu, 21 Aug 2008 17:18:56 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-21 expanding on #9 - commitment should be to the marriage itself & making it work. Marriage vows of standing by each other no matter what should be taken seriously and not just recited. If a couple is determined to work through any hardship, things ought to work out right in the end p.s: also agree with Kaila's comment Protection from extended family is a must! Couples should also keep their problems to themselves, because pouring your heart out to family members compounds the situation - They are never as willing to forgive as you are. expanding on #9 – commitment should be to the marriage itself & making it work. Marriage vows of standing by each other no matter what should be taken seriously and not just recited.

If a couple is determined to work through any hardship, things ought to work out right in the end

p.s: also agree with Kaila’s comment
Protection from extended family is a must!
Couples should also keep their problems to themselves, because pouring your heart out to family members compounds the situation – They are never as willing to forgive as you are.

]]> By: Kaila http://blog.ninthball.com/2008/07/qualities-of-a-good-marriage/comment-page-1/#comment-20 Kaila Wed, 20 Aug 2008 21:27:13 +0000 http://blog.ninthball.com/?p=33#comment-20 In addition to point #13, Protection from extended family is sometimes necessary and also important, especially when there's existing tension between a spouse and in-laws.. And from a more spiritual angle, prayer is also an important addition to marriage practices. "A family that prays together stays together"! In addition to point #13, Protection from extended family is sometimes necessary and also important, especially when there’s existing tension between a spouse and in-laws..

And from a more spiritual angle, prayer is also an important addition to marriage practices. “A family that prays together stays together”!

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